Forgiveness can be seen as one of the toughest steps in healing, and the students of San Dimas seem to agree. Adolescents today have no doubt been leaning toward the societal norm of a toxic and vengeful mindset. Ranging from petty high school drama to destructive relationships that can leave one weak mentally, hate has been spewed in a variety of ways. However, the cycle of healing has one crucial step that most people seem to overlook frequently: forgiveness.
Nowadays, people are so keen on pushing through their pain and quickly suppressing situations that alternative perspectives that can help one learn the concept of acceptance are never even addressed. Conflict, rage, abuse, and revenge are everywhere. Society has decided to normalize these feelings when it is up to the individual to find it within themselves to learn to let go.
In a recent interview with mental health specialist, Mr. Flowers, he discusses what forgiveness truly means in mental health. “I think forgiveness can be defined as one’s ability to make peace and amends with an internal struggle for the tension that’s existed within a relationship”, he goes on to say, “It seems like as a society we do tend to overlook forgiveness as a means by which we can create a more cohesive and connective community or society.”
Of course, forgiving someone or something is not always easy, but it is a completely realistic idea. In another interview with senior Olivia Romero, she revealed a time when it almost seemed impossible to manifest forgiveness, but she prevailed and demonstrated peace. “I used to have problems with this girl and I thought I would never be able to forgive her for what she said to not only me but my other friends, but I decided to be the bigger person, confront her, work it out and forgive her because I was just tired of having the problems on me all the time”
Junior Dali Llovido, also described a time where it wasn’t the matter of forgiving another, but finding self forgiveness. “I can’t really forgive myself when I make mistakes. I used to put myself down a lot but I think I’m way stronger now, of course I’m still working on how to be gentle with myself, but its in the process”.
Some ways you can stray away from a lingering mindset of spite would be to first acknowledge the pain and create a gentle space for you to feel those emotions without setting a destructive course of action. The cycle of pain and revenge is limited and unworthy of energy, but growing the ability to forgive allows you to simultaneously grow the ability of empathy for not just others, but your own person as well. You can also practice forgiveness by not just being confined to one perspective, but as well as other people’s perspectives. Knowing that humans are all living to make mistakes and grow is a helpful way to think about it. And finally, remember that forgiveness is a process, don’t rush into accepting something that is still inflicting pain.
